“We Can Only Do Little Things With Great Love”

“We can’t do great things in this life. We can only do little things with great love.” – Mother Teresa

This quote ran through my head this morning as I hunched over a set of the grottiest, gnarliest toe nails I have ever seen in my life. With my lower back burning and my gag reflex barely in check, I positioned the clippers and pushed down hard enough to send tingles of exertion up the length of my forearm. Still the thick, greying nail would not give. The smell of industrial cleaner and the spilled breakfast on her shirt mingled with the fresh morning air as I shifted positions and tried to get a better angle. When I finally heard the snap followed by the tiny clatter as the clipping joined a host of others in the stainless steel dish, I looked up in time to see her toothy grin and, for a moment, satisfaction replaced my barely-concealed-squeamishness at the morning’s activity.

As I settle into my second week in New Delhi, my respect grows exponentially for Mother Teresa and the wonderful organization she founded. Way back in October, I got schooled by Oprah when she asked, “Do You Want The Millions or Do You Want The Work?” and now I have the chance to sink knee-deep into the work as I remind myself that THIS is what volunteering is REALLY about. I think many of us set off on volunteer adventures with grand illusions of changing the world, but sometimes it’s really about cutting 65 sets of toe and finger nails, spooning curry into the gummy, bird-like mouth of a grandmother with Parkinson’s, and bouncing a mini basketball alongside a sweet faced Indian angel who also happens to have Down’s Syndrome. Continue reading

The Secrets We Keep…

Have you ever felt afraid to say something out loud because you KNEW if your friends, co-workers, or even your significant other heard it, they would JUDGE you? Maybe in your weak moments, you debate trusting someone with the truth. But, as the words climb up your esophagus, you grind your teeth and stuff them back down to the tight pit at the base of your stomach.

You swallow your secret because you THINK if you allow the truth to surface, you will have to face your friend’s plastic smile; her awkward shifting in the seat; and her abrupt change of subject. You can’t handle the risk she will make a mental black mark against your name in her little book of who is worthy of her friendship, love, and attention. So, you choose to show her the person you wish you were instead of the messy, imperfect person you actually are. Continue reading

Vietnam: The Story Behind the Stories…

First of all, Happy Give Love to ALL the People Who Matter To You Day from New Delhi, India!

Yes, like two of my inspirations: Brene Brown and Marie at Journeying Behind Breast Cancer, I am jumping on the rebranding Valentine’s Day bandwagon. For all of you other singles out there who would prefer to pretend Feb 14th doesn’t exist, I’ll let you in on a secret…

February is a great month to volunteer locally or internationally and to share your heart with people who need a little love and attention. If you’re overseas, you’ll also enjoy the fringe benefit of escaping from the Hallmark cards, the chocolates in heart shaped boxes, and the chatter of co-workers as they trade notes on their romantic dinner plans. Nope – I’m not the Valentine’s Scrooge because I happen to be single this year. I feel the same way regardless of which side of the relationship coin I’m on. And, as my time in both Cape Town and Vietnam has taught me, LOVE sometimes comes in the most unexpected packages

Whether you’re newly flying solo, blissfully crashing into love, or plodding through the ups and downs of everlasting togetherness, I think today is a GREAT day to tell the people in your life (single and coupled up) how much their friendship means to you. On that note, I’m sending BIG LOVE to all of my Sisters From Another Mister and Brothers From Another Mother around the globe! Continue reading

What Will Your Legacy Be?

With sweat building under the rim of my helmet, my toes baking beneath the sun’s 9:00am glare, and each breath a smorgasbord of motorcycle exhaust, it’s just another morning in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam.

A month ago when I arrived in Ha Noi, each crash-defying ride on a motorcycle had me glued to my host, arms latched around her waist and pulse in a dead sprint. Now, as nonchalantly as a local (although I opt for SPF 45 instead of a floppy sun hat, long sleeved lion-print hoodie, evening gloves, and socks with my sandals), I lean into each turn. My fingers wrapped lightly around the plastic bar at the back of the seat, I’m relaxed, but still ready for a screeching stop or the jarring of a random pothole.

Twenty minutes pass before my new friend, To Oanh, a journalist with the Tuoi Tre Newspaper pulls into a narrow alley and cuts the engine. As I clamber off, two plastic red stools are pulled onto the cracked cement and a slim, middle-aged local man in faded rubber flip-flops gestures for me to sit (half squat) as he mixes ice, coffee, and milk powder into a glass. For a moment, I think about the rule of avoiding ice in a developing country, but I don’t have the heart to refuse. You see – this isn’t just ANY open-air alley “coffee shop”. For 16 years, this little stall provided a living for a family of 4, including one of Ho Chi Minh’s most inspiring citizens. Continue reading

Even Death Unites Us…

Has my title scared you off yet? The topic of death, especially for anyone who has lived through hearing the words, “you have cancer”, can make even the most resilient of us squirm in our chairs. With a chalky mouth and a thready pulse, we look for an exit from the room, the conversation, and the risk that one day we will wake up with a unexplained pain and a doctor will pull an x-ray out of it’s sterile envelope, slide it onto a lit surface, and show us a colony of little metastases hunkered down deep in our bones.

A Patient - Carolyn Taylor

In some ways, the deluge of pink ribbons and announcements of bright and shiny 5-year survival statistics has lulled us (or maybe it’s just me) into a fairytale land where we can almost convince ourselves that surgeons dressed in crisp scrubs and oncologists packing an arsenal of chemotherapy drugs will protect ALL of us from the risk of eventual death. But, if you heard the buzz on February 4th about World Cancer Day, you might know the truth. “More people die from cancer than from AIDS, malaria, and tuberculosis combined. Each year globally, 12.7 million people learn they have cancer, and 7.6 million people die from the disease. Even more alarming, the World Health Organization projects that without immediate action, the global number of deaths from cancer will increase by nearly 80% by 2030, with most occurring in low- and middle-income countries.” Continue reading

Sometimes A Picture Speaks Louder Than Words…

As I sit here, sweating in the Saigon heat, there is so much I want to tell you about my time at the HCMC Cancer Hospital. But with a heart wrung out by emotion, I, for once, am at loss for words…

So instead of telling you about the intensity of seeing 10 women, fresh from their mastectomies, sharing a single, un-airconditioned room. Or about the congestion of people waiting to be admitted, waiting to see a doctor, or waiting to be well enough to go home, I want to instead share the wonderful pictures of a cancer survivor/photographer who has gone before me.

An ex-pat I met in Ha Noi introduced me via email and skype to Carolyn Taylor and I identified right away with her mission. Carolyn recently won a grant from British Airways and received ten free international flights to photograph women living with cancer around the globe. Her goal through this project was to show how women living with cancer are intrinsically linked. I know Carolyn is someone who is about to make a big impact on cancer patients around the world with her brand new NGO – Global Focus on Cancer and I look forward to helping her in any way I can. Continue reading

Lost in Translation…

The young girl stoops over and uses the wiry bristles of the short broom to scrape up chopstick wrappers, orange rinds, dust, and leaves, until all that remains is a tangled pile of refuse on the bare cement. Stacked blue and red plastic stools tower like soldiers behind me and large baskets filled with plates and bowls lie basking in the sun. Flies dart at my legs and arms and I shift to get comfortable on the hard wooden bench.

I miss my new friend already. Although we met only a few hours ago, her easy smile and quick laugh, worked their way into my heart. In near perfect english, she entertained me with stories about her recent exchange trip to India and then explained the customs involved in her upcoming wedding. She asked me questions about Canada, my travels, and whether I ever want to get married and have a family. (In case you’re wondering, the answer is yes and I know I’m not getting any younger as everyone in Vietnam likes to remind me). Continue reading